How to be a Good Partner

This first appeared in The Islander, published by the Nassau-Suffolk Bridge Association, and was reprinted in Marty Bergen's January, 1994 column in The Bulletin.

1. Don't give lessons (unless you are being paid to do so).
2. Never say anything to your partner unless you would want him to say it to you.
3. Never "result" (criticize your partner for a normal action just because it didn't work this time.
4. Never discuss a hand just played with your partner unless your intent is to clear up a misunderstanding in bidding or on defense. Therefore, the only reason to discuss partner's declarer play is that you wish to praise it.
5. If you feel the urge to be nasty, sarcastic or critical, excuse yourself and take a walk.
6. Don't forget that your partner wants to win as much as you do.
7. Don't ever criticize or embarrass your partner in front of others.
8. When you have time between hands, try to discuss topics other than bridge. [Note: I'm sure they meant between rounds; you should never have time between hands.]
9. When you want to ask another player about a disaster, ask about your hand instead of partner's.
10. Remember that you and your partner are on the same side.
11. Like your partner and root for him 100 percent. You should feel just as bad about his mistakes as you do about your own.
12. If you are unsure about whether your partner would want you to say something, don't.
13. Remember that this is only a card game.
14. Have a good time and make sure that your partner has a good time also.
15. Never assume that your partner has made a mistake until the hand is over and you have time to think it through.
16. Although it may be unfashionable, it is OK to be nice to a partner you happen to live with.
17. Think twice before verbally analyzing a hand. Don't embarrass yourself with a hasty inaccurate comment.
18. When you voluntarily choose to play with someone, it is unfair to get upset (externally or internally) when he doesn't play any better than usual.
19. Never side with an opponent against your partner. If you can't support your partner, keep your big mouth shut.
20. If you are too good for a partner, or don't enjoy playing with him, do everyone a favor and choose someone else for next time. That is much better than being a martyr. On the other hand, don't dump a partner unless you are sure.